Silly Song Stealing

Despite my silence on the blogsphere, life has been going on unabated. While the events thereof are relatively un-post-worthy (i.e. "boring"), last night I was inspired to compose a bit of lyrical silliness. I don't think I could point to any one thing as the inspiration for doing this: it resulted from a combination of various things, chief among them some "interesting" comments made in one of my classes. It's not my best work, but I hope you'll find it entertaining. It's a parody of "When You Got It, Flaunt It" from The Producers. The original lyrics can be found here (among many other places) if you care to reference them.

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"Knowledge Is Power"
(or "Scholarly Pride")
(or "When You've Got Brains, Flaunt 'Em")

When you've got it, flaunt it:
Write a book and show your stuff.
People say humility's a virtue,
But academic modesty can hurt you.

When you've got it, flaunt it:
Show your brilliance, let 'em know you're shrewd!
Your genius you must flash
If you want the fame and cash,
When you've got it, don't be subdued!

When you've got it, show it,
Put your hidden learning on display.
Some people dislike exaggeration,
But academics love a dissertation!

When you've got it, shout it!
Show your brains off, leave 'em all amazed!
Actors thrive on hype;
All a sage needs is pipe,
So if you've got it, get yourself praised!

When I was just a little boy in first grade,
My parents often gave me this advice:
In every class, don't hesitate to ace it,
Or you might have to take those classes twice.
Take them twice!

When you've got it, share it.
Let the public see your works arcane.
Some say snobbery is an offender,
But ev'ry scholar knows it gets you tenure!

If you've got it, give it:
Share your knowledge each and ev'ry hour!
Don't be silent, be verbose:
Give their ears an overdose.
When you've got it, knowledge is power!
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Coming soon (within a few days): "I Wanna Be a Professor." Because I'm just that crazy.