More Prof Quotes

Somewhat overdue, here's "Spring 2008 Professor Quotes, Part 2":

Theo 2:
“A spoonful of relevance makes the abstraction go down.”

“I consume Cheerios in bulk.”

“I try to be a cheerful Calvinist, because, as you may have noticed, there are lots of grumpy and bitter Calvinists.”

“You ever think of the angels sitting around watching God create like it was their team winning the Super Bowl?”

“If all he’s [God] got is glue and drinking straws, he’s never gonna see transatlantic passenger flights.”

“The writing we do by way of text-messaging and emails is the wild, wild West. There are no rules.”

“The opportunities for speculation here are just limitless.”

“Satan was sort of like the prototypical Pelagian.” (seeking to produce his own beatification rather than receiving it by grace)

“I heard that in a song once; I freaked out! God is not the ocean!”

“The Greeks thought of just about everything.”

“Computers know when you’re vulnerable.” (on the importance of saving your work)

“Solve Oprah’s spiritual conundrum?”

“I wrote a research paper last week called ‘This Lecture.’”

“I feel pretty alienated from politics right now, what with the presidential primaries going on…and just having paid taxes.”

PROF: “Well, it’s kind of ambiguous.”
STUDENT: “On purpose?”
PROF: “Let’s pretend it was.”

“It’s the Augustine in Pascal that makes him sound like Calvin.”

“Before you’re ordained as a Catholic priest, you can’t do the presto-changeo.” (i.e., transubstantiation)

“There’s an apocalyptic view of human nature: ‘This is the worst we’ve been in all of human history!’ But we’ve been pretty good at sin for a long time.”

“The time that normally goes into writing the lecture instead went into grading your papers. So this will be sort of open discussion time; you’ll be able to ask lots of questions.”

“The goal here is to send you off to your summer holiday in a state of total depression.” (on covering the punishment of sin in the final lecture)


Metaphysics 1
“My head explodes when I try to think about that [working out the intricate details of God’s existence], so I just let it go.”

“I want you to loosen up. And by that I mean, ‘Don’t be a naturalist.’”

“I will go to my grave refusing to let some guy in a lab coat tell me what to believe.”

“On this view, there’s no beaming anybody up, thank you very much, Scotty.”

“What is it like to be appeared to echolocatorily?”
(re: How bats see the world)

Kant “saved the unity of Europe only by trapping us all in the same prison.”


New Testament Survey
"You'll have to ask Dr. So-and-so about that. I'm not a systematic theologian, because I prefer to just stick to what the Bible says."